A friend of mine didn't go to the doctor for 15 years.
Fifteen years. She was fearful of what they might find, and she was "way too busy for that." I'm glad to say she is doing well. But I've thought a lot about those two reasons sitting side by side, because I hear them all the time.
Last week I wrote about the responsibility we have to the people around us to look after our health. This week I want to talk about what stops us, because most of us already know we should go.
You are not the only one
In a national survey of American adults, about 36% said they had avoided a doctor's visit even when they suspected they should go. A 2025 review of 92 studies, covering more than 560,000 people, found that nearly one in three avoided or were likely to avoid medical information. For cancer, it was 29%.
So if you've been putting something off, you are in plenty of company. And the reasons aren't all about fear. When US researchers asked people why they stayed away, cost came up for 24% and time for almost 16%. Those are real barriers, and I would never dismiss them.
But sometimes "I'm too busy" is telling the truth, and sometimes it's fear wearing a very respectable disguise.
Why not knowing feels safer
Here's what I see in my work. Your deeper mind doesn't experience avoidance as a mistake. It experiences it as protection.
Every time you cancel that appointment, you feel a small wave of relief. Your brain notices the relief and learns from it: staying away made the bad feeling stop. So next time, the urge to stay away is a little stronger. That's how one postponed appointment turns into 15 years.
This has nothing to do with being weak or foolish. It's your protective system doing what it was built to do. The trouble is that it's protecting you from a feeling, not from the illness. An illness doesn't wait because we aren't looking at it.
I think about my freckle. It looked like nothing to me. If I had decided not to know, it would still have been exactly what it was.
Getting yourself through the door
You don't have to stop being afraid before you go. You only need to take the next small step.
1. Choose one appointment. Don't try to fix 15 years in a week. Pick the one that matters most.
2. Book it before you can talk yourself out of it. Do it now, while you're reading this.
3. Tell them you're nervous. Doctors and nurses hear this all the time, and most are glad to know.
4. Take someone with you. A second pair of ears helps, and so does a hand to hold.
5. Write down your questions. Fear makes us forget them the moment we sit down.
6. Ask about cost up front. If money is the barrier, ask the office what your options are.
If the fear is bigger than a list can handle, that's where I can help. Hypnosis can settle the part of you that panics at the thought of the waiting room, the needle or the scanner, so you can get yourself there. It doesn't replace medical care, and I don't diagnose or treat medical conditions. My part is helping you walk through the door.
Your doctor can only help with what they get to see. So please, let them see it.
Whatever brings you here, there is a way through.
Jill Lien is a Board Certified Clinical Hypnotist and ICBCH Certified Instructor. She doesn't give medical advice, so please take any health concerns to your own doctor.
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